Nov. 21, 2011
Ladies and gentlemen, your Big Sky Conference champion University of Montana Grizzlies!!! Back on top, where we belong. Talk about a complete game. That was unbelievable. I thought I had a lock on a video stream on my computer, but none of the computers here would allow me to bring up the feed. I was relegated to watching a play-by-play feed. Talk about agony! But it was all worth it.
You tell me how I'm supposed to decide who gets the "Roundhouse Kick of the Week"! How do I choose between these efforts:
The overall defensive effort that held the Hairy Pickles' vaunted offense to 250 yards. Only 79 rushing yards and 171 passing yards. That's fantastic.
Any other Saturday afternoon, a safety would easily get you a Roundhouse Kick. My apologies to Trumaine Johnson, because it doesn't this weekend. That was a sweet sack from the corner, though. Great call, too.
Peter Nguyen had 123 yards on 19 carries, including a shifty 21-yard touchdown scamper that left at least four Hairy Pickles running to the trainers to get new jockstraps.
Dan Moore had 116 bruising yards and a touch on 15 carries. You are a brute. Welcome back.
Jabin Sambrano. You wanted that solo Roundhouse Kick, didn't you? That 79-yard touchdown catch was a thing of beauty. Just steal the ball from the opponent and outrun everybody.
And let's not forget Jordan Johnson, who was masterful running the offense. Not huge numbers, but definitely big time when it counted. The main thing were the two touchdowns and no interceptions.
Even two-time Roundhouse Kick recipient Brody McKnight was thirsty for more. "Steady Eddie" (or "Steady Brody" I guess?) on PATs and field goals and brilliant on punts, helping us win the field position battle early.
So how do I choose between all of those outstanding efforts? I don't. A Roundhouse Kick doesn't do justice to the perfection that occurred this nippy Saturday afternoon in Bozeman. I'm thinking of giving the Griz my firstborn child as a show of my respect and admiration. I just gotta get my wife's approval.
Okay, I just talked to my wife, and once she figured out I wasn't joking, she nixed that idea. Using the logic I learned in college, that means she wants me to give you my SECOND-born child. But he's too fun right now, and I haven't seen him in a while. How about this ... I am verbally committing Cooper Shuman to use the full ride academic and football scholarship the University of Montana just now offered him. You're welcome, and thank YOU!
The Great Divide Trophy is back where it belongs. And I now have a laminated flashcard that I will carry with me for an entire year. It will be used any time I encounter a Hairy Pickle fan who decides to start talking trash, regardless of what happens in the playoffs. The card is simple. It has four numbers and a dash on it. It reads "36-10."
I'm kind of over the whole BCS picture. As I've mentioned before, it seems that every year the FBS proves it needs to move to a playoff system. But what a crazy weekend. No. 2 Oklahoma State goes down. No. 4 Oregon goes down. No. 5 Oklahoma goes down. No. 7 Clemson goes down BIG. There will be controversy once again this year. That is all.
Back to the FCS. Stony Brook beat Liberty 41-31, scoring 10 unanswered points in the fourth quarter. I got that one wrong. Stony Brook gets the automatic bid.
Albany defeated Sacred Heart to lock up the automatic bid from the Northeast Conference.
Georgia Southern put up a bit of a fight in the first half against Alabama before getting beat pretty bad. Didn't matter. They had the Southern Conference locked up last weekend.
Towson defeated Rhode Island to lock up their automatic bid from the Colonial conference. Hey, I'm doing pretty well so far.
Tennessee Tech locked up the Ohio Valley conference bid, Sam Houston State finalized its bid from the Southland Conference, and Norfolk finished its regular season still well out front in the Mid-Eastern Conference.
North Dakota State bounced back after an upset to claim the bid in the Missouri Valley Conference, while Lehigh walked away with the Patriot League bid.
So how did ol' Shuey do in his picks for the automatic bids?
Conference: Pick -- Actual
Big Sky: Griz -- Griz
Big South: Liberty -- Stony Brook
Northeast: Albany -- Albany
Southern: Georgia Southern -- Georgia Southern
Colonial: Towson -- Towson
Ohio Valley: Tennessee Tech -- Tennessee Tech
Southland: Sam Houston State -- Sam Houston State
Mid-Eastern: Norfolk -- Norfolk
Missouri Valley: North Dakota State -- North Dakota State
Patriot: Lehigh -- Lehigh
Nine out of ten ain't too shabby. I'll take it. How did the other half of the playoffs work out?
Pick -- Actual
Hairy Pickles -- Hairy Pickles
Appalachian State -- Appalachian State
Wofford -- Wofford
Northern Iowa -- Northern Iowa
Maine -- Maine
Old Dominion -- Old Dominion
New Hampshire -- New Hampshire
Illinois State -- Central Arkansas
Georgetown -- Eastern Kentucky
Duquesne -- James Madison
Overall, I nailed 16 of 20 picks. I didn't pay much attention to Central Arkansas (Southland Conference), because I think that's a pretty weak conference. They got destroyed by a Sam Houston State team that's getting a bye it doesn't deserve in the first round, a weak team the second round, and then will get destroyed by its third-round opponent (not going to give you that opponent until next week. Nice try though).
Same goes for Eastern Kentucky. I just didn't think another team deserved to come out of the Ohio Valley Conference, but I'll go with it.
I totally disagree with James Madison getting in. They were picked over some other teams with better records. Granted, they may have been in weaker conferences, but Duquesne (9-2, Northeast), North Dakota (8-3, Great West) and Bethune-Cookman (8-3, Mid-Eastern) all should have gotten a chance before James Madison.
I would even put Georgetown (8-3, Patriot) in that category, but that might be a bit of a stretch. The fact is, JMU made it on reputation, and that's bunk. Heck, I think there are some 7-4 teams out there that should have made it before them, Portland State included. But the 20 have been selected for "The Prom," and there's no turnin' back once you have a date.
Here are the play-in games next weekend, with my picks:
Stony Brook Seawolves (8-3) vs. Albany Great Danes (8-3)
The Seawolves and the Great Danes. Just for clarification, Stony Brook is the Seawolves, and Albany is the Great Danes. Yeah, I know, I wasn't sure either. I'm a dog person, so I'm going with the Great Danes of Albany. Plus, Stony Brook lost to an Ivy League school earlier this year (Brown), and those snobs don't like our playoffs. This pick really has nothing to do with football. It doesn't matter, as neither team can beat Sam Houston State.
Tennessee Tech Golden Eagles (7-3) vs. Central Arkansas Bears (8-3)
I'm going with Tennessee Tech. Central Arkansas REALLY didn't play anybody this year. Tennessee Tech has the same moniker as the university (Marquette!) I went to, so I'll stick with them. This one doesn't matter either, as neither team can beat the Griz. We'll get into more detail on that matchup when the time comes.
Old Dominion Monarchs (9-2) vs. Norfolk State Spartans (9-2)
I'd like to go with Norfolk State just because they have the same mascot as the town I was born (Scobey!), but ODU has fared well in a pretty tough conference. Wait, their mascot is a butterfly (It's not, actually. It's a lion or something, but in my mind it's a butterfly). Go, Spartans! Norfolk State wins in a minor upset. Georgia Southern will be next, and it will be ugly.
Eastern Kentucky Colonels (7-4) vs. James Madison Dukes (7-4)
I'm picking the Colonels just to prove a point. James Madison stole someone's spot in this tourney. And I think Eastern Kentucky will surprise the Bison the following week, too.
So what did we learn, children? I guess we learned that the secret to my success is picking the mascot I like most. Or maybe the pretty colors? I know we learned that the Griz are back at the top of the hill in the Brawl of the Wild. I learned that I'm going to root for the Hairy Pickles from here on out until we play them again. And Stuart Smalley taught me that I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggonit, people like me.
We'll see you next week, folks. This is the best part of the season, right here. It's playoff time, and a champion will be determined with no controversy.
Go Griz, Hairy Pickles DON'T suck for now, God Bless, Keep Supporting Our Troops, Rangers Lead the Way!
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